Pun of the Day: 16 April 2009

2 archaeologists, Laura and Susan, are in Mexico excavating the Mayan ruins there looking for a full human specimen to take back to their museum.

Unfortunately, they're not having nearly as much luck as they'd like; all the human specimens are horrendously de-composed, and therefore unsuitable for museum use (they'd fall apart before ever getting there!).

"Susan", says Laura, "I don't think we're going to find anything down here!"

"Keep digging, Laura, I'm sure we'll find something," Susan responds.  "A good Mayan is hard to find."

Pun of the Day: 15 April 2009

A cowboy walked into a bar and ordered a whiskey. When the bartender delivered the drink, the cowboy asked, “Where is everybody?”

The bartender replied, “They’ve gone to the hanging.”

“Hanging? Who are they hanging?”

“Brown Paper Pete,” the bartender replied.

“What kind of a name is that?” the cowboy asked.

“Well,”said the bartender, “he wears a brown paper hat, brown paper shirt, brown paper trousers and brown paper shoes.”

“Weird guy,” said the cowboy. “What are they hanging him for?”

“Rustling."

Pun of the Day: 14 April 2009

I was wondering why the baseball kept growing larger and larger. Then it hit me.

* * * *

I forgot how to throw a boomerang, but it eventually came back to me.

Pun of the Day: 8 April 2009

Police arrested a man for throwing land-mines, but he walked away after they dropped the charges.

Pun of the Day: 3 April 2009

I used to be a tap dancer, but stopped after I fell into the sink.

Pun of the Day: 2 April 2009

Some people's noses and feet were built backwards: their noses run and their feet smell.

Pun of the Day: 1 April 2009

A young child swallows a whole piggy bank's worth of coins, and is soon rushed to the hospital after developing massive stomach-aches. The doctors took him to have some tests run and some x-rays done.

His parents, of course, were worried sick, and when the doctor (and accompanying orderlies) wheeled the boy back into his hospital room they inquired as to the boy's condition.

"No change yet," the doctor replied.